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So tell me, what are you hiding from yourself?
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Who are you trying to fool with your fake smiles
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and your empty laughter?
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You know, maybe you can't reach that goal you're striving for
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because you're just too afraid to take the steps
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necessary to get there.
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Or maybe you're afraid that you'll fall back
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in your old ways, even if you do succeed.
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And if any of those resonate with you,
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then hey, you're not alone.
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But don't be afraid of success.
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Learn to embrace your past,
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just like today's character from ReZero did.
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And that's of course, the witch of frost, Emilia.
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Hey, what's going on guys?
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My name is Nate,
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and you're listening to the Otaku Liberation,
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a show where we help you break free from the chains
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that are holding you back in your life
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by connecting some biblical principles
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with themes from your favorite anime.
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And without further ado, let's get into it.
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So for this whole concept of, you know,
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facing your past, me and just dealing with, you know,
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fate, your past, your future, all of these things, right,
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that we look for answers to, right?
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One of the main verses that came to mind
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is Psalm chapter 103, verse 12.
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And it goes, as far as the East is from the West,
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so far has He removed our transgressions from us.
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And essentially what that saying is, you know,
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as God forgives and forgets our transgressions,
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the sins, the bad things that we've done in our life, right?
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And He does that by grace,
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so there's nothing that we can try or earn
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or do anything for ourselves like that.
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But if our Heavenly Father, our Creator,
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if He can forgive, if He forgives our transgressions,
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then why can't you forgive yourself?
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You know, because I mean, in the ultimate power,
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He said it's okay, so why can't you do that for yourself?
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And really that's what today's episode is gonna be about,
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is learning how to face your past
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instead of running away from it,
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or just face it and not just face it and view it,
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but to also accept it, right?
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And we're gonna break that down
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by looking at how Amelia literally had to face her past.
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We're not talking about some self-reflection
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or anything like that.
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Like, no, no, no, she had to go back,
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she had to go back and see her past unfold
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right before her eyes again.
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And so before we get into that part of me,
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backtrack a little bit.
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So to understand Amelia as a character, right?
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So Amelia has a very striking resemblance
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to the Witch of Envy, who is,
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for as far as we know at the current point in time,
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is the main antagonist of the series, right?
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The series of Re Zero.
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And the Witch of Envy is one of the sinful witches, right?
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Who are all villains and villainesses in their own right,
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but she's the worst of the worst
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because she ended up killing the rest of them
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for some reason.
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And Amelia has a very, very striking resemblance to her.
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I almost like she could be her daughter,
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which she's implied to be.
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But that, just her looking like the witch
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led to a lot of hatred from the people around her,
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mainly the humans and the people who,
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honestly, it's justified.
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Witch of Envy is a terrible, terrible existence, right?
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She did so many unspeakable things to the people around.
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So when they see Amelia,
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they can't help but be reminded of that.
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And of course, they can do what anybody who hates them,
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they speak ill of her, they just,
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it's just bad mouth, bad mouth all the time, right?
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And that has caused her to essentially close herself off
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from the world.
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And because before Amelia lived in a village with her aunt,
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who she called her mom,
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because she was the one taking care of her,
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and then all the other village elves and things like that.
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But due to events in the story,
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and she wound up being alone,
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save for her familiar Puck, who eventually found her.
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But from a long time, it was just those two.
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It was just the two of them.
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And due to how the people in the village and town
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treated her, she figured just to avoid as much conflict
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as she could.
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So she kept to herself.
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And my question is,
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why are you closing yourself off?
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Why are you pushing away the other people?
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Not necessarily the ones who are calling you,
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calling out your name, saying hateful things about you.
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Because, hey, I don't want to deal with those people either.
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I'm just gonna be honest with you,
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I don't have the time or the patience or the effort
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to deal with those type of people.
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But I know how easy it is to do that to everybody you meet,
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to everybody who's around, to just push everyone away
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and close yourself off completely.
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And it may seem good at first.
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I mean, it may seem like the right thing to do
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for your own sake, for your own sanity.
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But there are people out there
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who genuinely want to help you,
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who genuinely just want to get to know you,
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genuinely love you, just want to love on you.
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And when you're hurt,
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it's easy to become blinded to that,
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to become blinded to the genuineness
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of somebody else's love and care for you.
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So that's why I asked the question,
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because someone had asked myself too,
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it was like, why do you close yourself off?
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Do you feel like you're not good enough?
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In some cases, you feel like they are not good enough.
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Do you feel like you can't be forgiven?
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Do you feel like you're not living up to their expectations,
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your own expectations?
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I mean, really, what is it?
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I mean, these are just, I don't know,
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not even real suggestions, right?
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But again, no one knows your heart better than you do,
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except for God, right?
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And he's not no one, he's the one, right?
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But seriously, why do you feel the need
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to cut yourself off?
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And again, as you know, we're all flawed creatures, right?
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Nobody's perfect.
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And the fact that people are calling Amelia,
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somebody that she's not, maybe somebody in your life
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are calling or saying what you are or who you are
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and whether they know you or not.
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And if you're not careful,
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you will allow what they say to influence who you are.
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And again, I know it's easier said than done,
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trust me, I know.
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And it's especially true for people in our younger generation
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what's coming up now,
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because in this time of social media
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and just everyone's so ironically so interconnected,
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if we haven't been further apart than we are now.
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And with so many different things to look at,
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so many people's lives are on full display,
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it's easy for the younger generation
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who don't have as much life experience,
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who haven't had time to develop their sense of self
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to be influenced by what other people say.
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When they're trying to become who these people
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through these screens are,
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and that's not who they've been called to be,
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it's just not, right?
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Now I'm not saying you can't be inspired by somebody else,
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you can't seize what someone else has done with their life
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and say, you know what, that's what I want.
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That's what I want my goal to be.
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I'm not saying that,
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because there's a difference between striving for a goal
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and striving to be somebody else,
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but all the two completely different things.
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And when you're young and impressionable,
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you don't know anything about the world,
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you don't even know who you are, right?
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And it's just, when you don't have the guidance,
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when you don't know who to go to,
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you either A, in the following anything and everyone,
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or B, you can do like Amelia
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and completely cut yourself off and say,
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no, I'll try to figure this out by myself.
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Both cases aren't really to the betterment of you.
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And yeah, like I said, man,
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like I said a couple episodes ago,
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this podcast is something that I worked on,
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I'm still working on for myself in a lot of ways
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and this is just me sharing it with you guys
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and spraying that resonates with somebody.
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And just know that, hey, you're not alone,
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you're not going through this alone, right?
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There's people ahead of you
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who've gone through the same thing to give you tips
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or people who are going through it right now,
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that they may need you just like you need them.
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Because like they say, misery loves company, right?
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But it's not in the sense that everyone wants to be
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just down together, it's just having that network,
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that support group to really get you out of this hole,
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and really get you out and go on to the next level.
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That's what this whole thing is about.
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And unfortunately for Amelia, her closing herself off
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led to a lack of emotional maturity
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and in a kind of twisted sense, it's funny.
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It's funny, when I was researching for this episode,
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and of course when I was watching the anime,
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it was a weird duality.
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So since Amelia shut herself off
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from the outside world for so long,
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and the only person she really interacted with was Puck,
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again, her spirit that she's in contract with,
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and eventually Roswald and the twins and everybody
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who came after, it caused her to,
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again, be emotionally stunted, so she doesn't really know
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how to deal with people and how to convey
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her own feelings and emotions.
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But at the same time, it caused her to heavily rely
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on those other people, namely Puck and Subaru,
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to be her source of strength, to be her counsel
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or guidance or whatever it is.
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You never knew how to do that for herself
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for the longest time.
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And as you go to show, if you don't allow yourself
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to essentially live life and to really go out there
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and make your mistakes, again, this isn't about
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you not making mistakes, this isn't about you
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not living up to what you're called to be, right?
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Because again, we're all human, we've all done something
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that we're not proud of, that we don't ever want
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to come to the light of day.
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And it is what it is, but again, you can't stay there, right?
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You can't stay there because ultimately you're gonna end up
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being stunted in one way or another.
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Now, all of this isn't just Amelia's fault in this, right?
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So again, she cut herself off from the world
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after her village was essentially frozen solid.
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And due to her resemblance of the Witch of Envy,
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people, you know, bad mouth her,
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they treated her terribly, right?
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But so in order to help alleviate some of her suffering,
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Puck decided he was gonna seal Amelia's memories away
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to keep her safe from that pain, to keep her protected,
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to keep her from having to suffer
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the way she had been suffering before.
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And on one hand, he's doing what he,
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he did what he did because he loves her
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and he wants her to be safe and protected.
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But sometimes doing what we think is helpful
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might end up causing more harm than good.
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And I say I know, I don't know,
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because I'm not a parent, but I sympathize with parents
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because a lot of the, almost everything that they do
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is for the betterment of their child in some form of fashion,
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you know, whatever it is,
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parents go above and beyond for their children.
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And as a children,
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we never really truly understand that,
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I guess, until we have our own kids.
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Like I said, I don't have any children.
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So I can't fully grasp that concept yet.
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But as I've gotten older and, you know,
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experienced more of life and what the world is about,
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I do understand more and appreciate more
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00:13:00,360 --> 00:13:02,400
for what my parents did when I was younger
259
00:13:02,400 --> 00:13:05,040
and what they're doing now for my younger sister
260
00:13:05,040 --> 00:13:07,280
and things like that.
261
00:13:07,280 --> 00:13:09,680
But so that's what Puck was doing for Amelia,
262
00:13:09,680 --> 00:13:12,960
because at this point he was her pseudo father figure.
263
00:13:12,960 --> 00:13:16,120
And like I said, he's trying to shelter her from the pain,
264
00:13:16,120 --> 00:13:20,520
but in doing so, she was never able to process
265
00:13:20,520 --> 00:13:23,000
and to grow from that pain, right?
266
00:13:23,000 --> 00:13:24,760
So just because you hide something,
267
00:13:24,760 --> 00:13:26,960
just because you try to ignore it,
268
00:13:26,960 --> 00:13:28,480
doesn't mean it's not there.
269
00:13:30,240 --> 00:13:31,080
Let me say that again,
270
00:13:31,080 --> 00:13:33,360
just because you try to run for something,
271
00:13:33,360 --> 00:13:34,920
just because you're trying to hide for something,
272
00:13:34,920 --> 00:13:36,800
just because you try to ignore it,
273
00:13:36,800 --> 00:13:38,160
doesn't mean it's not there.
274
00:13:38,160 --> 00:13:39,880
Doesn't mean it's gonna go away.
275
00:13:39,880 --> 00:13:42,760
It's still there in the same spot that you left it.
276
00:13:42,760 --> 00:13:47,600
And if you never learn how to properly face it,
277
00:13:47,600 --> 00:13:51,280
then the trials that are gonna come later down in your life
278
00:13:51,280 --> 00:13:53,440
are gonna be that much harder.
279
00:13:53,440 --> 00:13:55,400
In Amelia's case, that was literally,
280
00:13:55,400 --> 00:13:57,000
like I'm not even being figured
281
00:13:57,000 --> 00:13:59,200
if that was exactly what happened.
282
00:13:59,200 --> 00:14:02,120
Because when they went to the sanctuary,
283
00:14:02,120 --> 00:14:06,920
which just happens to be the Witch of Greed's burial chambers
284
00:14:06,920 --> 00:14:08,080
in order to get out,
285
00:14:09,480 --> 00:14:13,720
those who have been accepted to be able to take on the trials,
286
00:14:13,720 --> 00:14:15,640
they have to pass through three trials
287
00:14:15,640 --> 00:14:19,560
in order to essentially lift the seal from the sanctuary
288
00:14:19,560 --> 00:14:21,000
so they can all leave.
289
00:14:21,000 --> 00:14:24,360
And Amelia was the one who had to go through the trials
290
00:14:24,360 --> 00:14:28,240
because, again, it's part of her thing
291
00:14:28,240 --> 00:14:30,400
to try to get elected as the next king
292
00:14:30,400 --> 00:14:33,600
and a bunch of political stuff, basically.
293
00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,760
But in the first trial,
294
00:14:36,760 --> 00:14:38,920
the first trial deals with your past
295
00:14:38,920 --> 00:14:40,840
and you having to face it.
296
00:14:40,840 --> 00:14:45,160
But because Amelia, she never faced her past
297
00:14:45,160 --> 00:14:47,160
in the first place, she never went through it.
298
00:14:47,160 --> 00:14:49,760
She, because her memories were sealed,
299
00:14:49,760 --> 00:14:53,280
she had a whole bunch of difficulties
300
00:14:53,280 --> 00:14:56,200
going through just the first trial.
301
00:14:56,200 --> 00:15:00,960
And she suffered way more during it
302
00:15:00,960 --> 00:15:02,800
than someone like Subaru did
303
00:15:02,800 --> 00:15:05,920
because Subaru went through the first trial himself as well.
304
00:15:05,920 --> 00:15:06,800
He passed it.
305
00:15:08,040 --> 00:15:10,240
It wasn't easy because he had to face his own past
306
00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:11,680
through the things that he regretted,
307
00:15:11,680 --> 00:15:15,240
things that he never got to say and nor do.
308
00:15:15,240 --> 00:15:17,160
But in Amelia's case,
309
00:15:17,160 --> 00:15:19,120
since most of her past, some of her past,
310
00:15:19,120 --> 00:15:20,640
she couldn't even remember.
311
00:15:23,480 --> 00:15:24,800
In her case, it wasn't a choice,
312
00:15:24,800 --> 00:15:27,360
but nevertheless, because of her past,
313
00:15:27,360 --> 00:15:30,240
she, something was ignored, it was never dealt with.
314
00:15:30,240 --> 00:15:32,640
It just carried on into the next season.
315
00:15:32,640 --> 00:15:35,200
So now when she had to face this current trial,
316
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:39,880
she must first reconcile with the past trauma first
317
00:15:39,880 --> 00:15:41,840
before she can even move on.
318
00:15:41,840 --> 00:15:46,840
And that leads me to my next question is,
319
00:15:47,320 --> 00:15:50,080
what are you turning a blind eye to?
320
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:54,680
What is something that you are willingly
321
00:15:54,680 --> 00:15:57,200
not dealing with, not looking at?
322
00:15:57,200 --> 00:15:59,920
Because again, in Amelia's case, for this example,
323
00:15:59,920 --> 00:16:03,560
she didn't choose for Puck to get rid of her memories.
324
00:16:03,560 --> 00:16:05,920
He did that of his own accord
325
00:16:05,920 --> 00:16:08,200
because he loved her and wanted to protect her.
326
00:16:08,200 --> 00:16:09,720
But I'm talking to you
327
00:16:09,720 --> 00:16:11,520
because I know throughout this whole episode,
328
00:16:11,520 --> 00:16:13,800
there's something or maybe many things
329
00:16:13,800 --> 00:16:17,200
that have come to mind that you are running away from,
330
00:16:17,200 --> 00:16:19,280
that you are hiding from.
331
00:16:19,280 --> 00:16:21,240
So I'm gonna ask you,
332
00:16:21,240 --> 00:16:23,400
what are you turning a blind eye to?
333
00:16:23,400 --> 00:16:25,400
What are the things that you see in your life
334
00:16:25,400 --> 00:16:29,080
that needs to be changed, that can be changed?
335
00:16:29,080 --> 00:16:31,600
And I'm not saying that you're not expecting
336
00:16:31,600 --> 00:16:33,240
you to do the impossible,
337
00:16:33,240 --> 00:16:36,520
but I know good and well there's something in your life
338
00:16:36,520 --> 00:16:40,400
that maybe you wanna change
339
00:16:40,400 --> 00:16:42,920
that you don't even know where to begin, right?
340
00:16:42,920 --> 00:16:46,120
But it's something that's in your heart.
341
00:16:46,120 --> 00:16:55,120
And the best analogy I can give is your past,
342
00:16:55,280 --> 00:16:57,120
it's kind of like our shadows, right?
343
00:16:57,120 --> 00:16:57,960
Think about it.
344
00:16:59,200 --> 00:17:02,640
In the darkest time, it seems like it's always around,
345
00:17:02,640 --> 00:17:05,040
it's always on your mind, everywhere you look,
346
00:17:05,040 --> 00:17:08,440
it's just that thing, the thing that you did,
347
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:10,480
the thing that is so unspeakable,
348
00:17:10,480 --> 00:17:14,040
the thing that you can't seem to break free from
349
00:17:14,040 --> 00:17:15,640
is all encompassing.
350
00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,240
And even when you get that little bit of joy,
351
00:17:17,240 --> 00:17:19,720
little bit of light in your life, right?
352
00:17:19,720 --> 00:17:22,320
Every time you turn around, boom, it's there, right?
353
00:17:22,320 --> 00:17:25,960
This is just there, looking back at you.
354
00:17:25,960 --> 00:17:29,280
But that's not the end of it,
355
00:17:29,280 --> 00:17:32,160
because yes, like our shadows,
356
00:17:32,160 --> 00:17:35,480
we can't escape from our past, it's a part of us, right?
357
00:17:35,480 --> 00:17:37,880
Everywhere you go, it's right there with you,
358
00:17:37,880 --> 00:17:41,080
right there next to you, right there beside you.
359
00:17:41,080 --> 00:17:45,760
So instead of letting it be a ball and chain
360
00:17:45,760 --> 00:17:49,240
that entraps you, because you don't wanna look at it,
361
00:17:49,240 --> 00:17:53,320
you don't wanna face it, you don't even wanna acknowledge it,
362
00:17:53,320 --> 00:17:57,160
why not turn around and face it, right?
363
00:17:57,160 --> 00:17:59,600
Because I don't know about you, but for me,
364
00:17:59,600 --> 00:18:00,680
if I'm gonna be stuck with something
365
00:18:00,680 --> 00:18:02,320
for the entirety of my life,
366
00:18:02,320 --> 00:18:05,040
I want to have it on my own terms, right?
367
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:06,720
I don't want to have this mind control,
368
00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:09,640
this vicious vice grip over my life.
369
00:18:09,640 --> 00:18:14,480
And now I'm just living in fear, anxiety, anger,
370
00:18:14,480 --> 00:18:15,800
every single day.
371
00:18:15,800 --> 00:18:19,200
I'd rather, it's like, no, I'm not gonna let you
372
00:18:19,200 --> 00:18:22,000
take over my life and just ruin my life
373
00:18:22,000 --> 00:18:26,160
for a mistake I made when I was five years old,
374
00:18:26,160 --> 00:18:27,760
whatever the case may be.
375
00:18:27,760 --> 00:18:31,760
And so again, that's just me.
376
00:18:31,760 --> 00:18:33,640
Maybe I'm built different, I don't know.
377
00:18:33,640 --> 00:18:37,160
But I do know that it is in everyone
378
00:18:37,160 --> 00:18:39,200
to be able to face your past,
379
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:41,520
because I think you owe it to yourself, right?
380
00:18:41,520 --> 00:18:43,640
You shouldn't be held accountable
381
00:18:43,640 --> 00:18:45,800
for a mistake you made when you were younger.
382
00:18:45,800 --> 00:18:46,640
You're right.
383
00:18:47,520 --> 00:18:48,520
At least not by yourself.
384
00:18:48,520 --> 00:18:51,880
I mean, if you did the crime, you've done the time,
385
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:54,840
you've moved past it, everyone else has moved past it,
386
00:18:54,840 --> 00:18:55,960
but you.
387
00:18:55,960 --> 00:18:59,360
And again, like with everything, it all starts from you.
388
00:18:59,360 --> 00:19:02,200
It all starts internally, right?
389
00:19:02,200 --> 00:19:05,920
Now, we all don't have this magical sanctuary place
390
00:19:05,920 --> 00:19:07,160
that we can go through and force you
391
00:19:07,160 --> 00:19:09,720
to go through your past to take on this trial.
392
00:19:09,720 --> 00:19:14,440
But I do know, most people have a mirror.
393
00:19:14,440 --> 00:19:17,160
So why don't you go in and look yourself in the mirror
394
00:19:17,160 --> 00:19:22,160
and truly, truly face and deal with whatever it is.
395
00:19:24,240 --> 00:19:26,680
Because again, I don't know you.
396
00:19:26,680 --> 00:19:28,160
You don't know me like that.
397
00:19:28,160 --> 00:19:30,880
And I don't know what you did.
398
00:19:31,720 --> 00:19:35,280
And you don't know what I did,
399
00:19:35,280 --> 00:19:36,680
you don't know what I've done.
400
00:19:36,680 --> 00:19:38,080
But at the end of the day,
401
00:19:40,000 --> 00:19:43,680
you have to learn to let go.
402
00:19:44,920 --> 00:19:46,800
Don't stop holding your fist so tight,
403
00:19:49,000 --> 00:19:50,720
for the good and for the bad things.
404
00:19:50,720 --> 00:19:55,720
Because we, this world again, life is hard.
405
00:19:56,600 --> 00:19:58,040
Life's hard enough.
406
00:19:58,040 --> 00:19:59,160
It really is.
407
00:19:59,160 --> 00:20:01,480
You got so many other oppositions out there
408
00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:03,080
who are trying to beat you down.
409
00:20:03,080 --> 00:20:03,920
Don't help them.
410
00:20:03,920 --> 00:20:06,560
Don't give them the ammunition.
411
00:20:06,560 --> 00:20:11,560
Don't give them the handicap by you handicapping yourself
412
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:13,880
because you don't know how to let go
413
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:15,440
of something that's happened.
414
00:20:15,440 --> 00:20:16,680
And if you got people around you
415
00:20:16,680 --> 00:20:18,280
who are constantly bringing up the past,
416
00:20:18,280 --> 00:20:21,520
who are constantly bringing up what you've done
417
00:20:21,520 --> 00:20:24,680
and never take the time to look at what they've done
418
00:20:24,680 --> 00:20:26,680
and things like that, then hey, trouble.
419
00:20:27,600 --> 00:20:28,720
So is yours.
420
00:20:28,720 --> 00:20:30,520
I know I spent like the last,
421
00:20:30,520 --> 00:20:32,520
I don't know how many episodes talking about
422
00:20:32,520 --> 00:20:34,800
getting around people who support you,
423
00:20:34,800 --> 00:20:37,000
who love you and who are real.
424
00:20:37,000 --> 00:20:38,280
Absolutely.
425
00:20:38,280 --> 00:20:40,640
But part of that is also about cutting,
426
00:20:40,640 --> 00:20:43,120
yeah, trim the fat and getting rid of the people
427
00:20:43,120 --> 00:20:46,520
who don't bring that into your life,
428
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:49,360
who aren't true and real to you, right?
429
00:20:49,360 --> 00:20:50,920
Who are always bringing up,
430
00:20:50,920 --> 00:20:52,320
oh, remember when you did this
431
00:20:52,320 --> 00:20:53,480
or remember when you did that
432
00:20:53,480 --> 00:20:55,240
or remember I helped you just one time
433
00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:57,440
and now you're gonna ask, you know what?
434
00:20:57,440 --> 00:20:59,920
People who keep bringing up the past
435
00:20:59,920 --> 00:21:01,280
and wind up living there.
436
00:21:01,280 --> 00:21:03,120
And I don't want that for you.
437
00:21:03,120 --> 00:21:06,760
So and of course that requires you to
438
00:21:06,760 --> 00:21:10,040
not only face your past, but to accept your past.
439
00:21:10,040 --> 00:21:13,040
And in Amelia's case, when she was able to
440
00:21:13,920 --> 00:21:18,280
first recall it, after Puck undid the seal on her memories,
441
00:21:18,280 --> 00:21:21,040
she was able to remember her past in its entirety,
442
00:21:21,040 --> 00:21:24,920
which allowed her to at least attempt the trial again.
443
00:21:24,920 --> 00:21:27,440
Now, again, getting her memories back
444
00:21:27,440 --> 00:21:28,440
was just the first step.
445
00:21:28,440 --> 00:21:31,000
The second step was to actually go through them again
446
00:21:31,000 --> 00:21:32,840
and face it.
447
00:21:32,840 --> 00:21:36,000
And hey, she was able to do just that.
448
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:38,800
And I'm not trying to give too many spoilers,
449
00:21:38,800 --> 00:21:41,760
but yeah, so watch the anime,
450
00:21:41,760 --> 00:21:43,560
it'd be like really good.
451
00:21:43,560 --> 00:21:46,720
But just know that she did in fact pass her trials
452
00:21:46,720 --> 00:21:48,800
after she was able to remember.
453
00:21:48,800 --> 00:21:53,800
And this is really the key part
454
00:21:53,920 --> 00:21:55,640
I kinda wanna drive home is that
455
00:21:55,640 --> 00:21:57,360
after she passed the trials, right?
456
00:21:57,360 --> 00:22:01,720
After she went through and faced her past,
457
00:22:01,720 --> 00:22:03,680
she saw her possible presence
458
00:22:03,680 --> 00:22:07,160
and then she saw what could be the future.
459
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:08,760
And then she passed all three trials,
460
00:22:08,760 --> 00:22:13,160
she came out with a renewed outlook on life.
461
00:22:13,160 --> 00:22:15,440
And she had an air of authority and certainty
462
00:22:15,440 --> 00:22:16,920
that she didn't have before.
463
00:22:16,920 --> 00:22:18,680
Because before Amelia was very,
464
00:22:20,200 --> 00:22:21,280
just reserved.
465
00:22:21,280 --> 00:22:22,120
I don't wanna say timid,
466
00:22:22,120 --> 00:22:24,720
because she's not really shy,
467
00:22:24,720 --> 00:22:27,000
but more reserved about her opinions
468
00:22:27,000 --> 00:22:29,080
and how she was feeling about me,
469
00:22:29,080 --> 00:22:30,080
how she was dealing with it.
470
00:22:30,080 --> 00:22:32,760
Like I said earlier, she relied primarily on Puck
471
00:22:32,760 --> 00:22:37,160
and Subaru to the heavy lifting quote unquote,
472
00:22:37,160 --> 00:22:40,560
when it comes to dealing with worldly issues
473
00:22:40,560 --> 00:22:41,520
and things like that.
474
00:22:41,520 --> 00:22:43,200
But after she went through her trials,
475
00:22:43,200 --> 00:22:46,040
after she faced and accepted her past
476
00:22:46,040 --> 00:22:49,480
and then beyond that into the possible futures
477
00:22:49,480 --> 00:22:51,520
as horrible as some of them may seem,
478
00:22:51,520 --> 00:22:54,880
she came out with like, you know what?
479
00:22:54,880 --> 00:22:55,960
It doesn't matter what's gonna come,
480
00:22:55,960 --> 00:22:58,640
I'm gonna do what I'm gonna do, right?
481
00:22:58,640 --> 00:23:00,120
I'm gonna do what I feel like is right,
482
00:23:00,120 --> 00:23:01,280
what I think is right.
483
00:23:01,280 --> 00:23:04,040
And whatever happens happens,
484
00:23:04,040 --> 00:23:06,080
I know I gave it my all.
485
00:23:06,080 --> 00:23:07,840
I know that I put forth the best effort
486
00:23:07,840 --> 00:23:10,800
I could possibly put going forward.
487
00:23:10,800 --> 00:23:14,480
And I'm not worried about what happened before,
488
00:23:14,480 --> 00:23:16,080
the past is in the past.
489
00:23:16,080 --> 00:23:19,040
It happened, I acknowledge that it happened,
490
00:23:19,040 --> 00:23:21,800
and now I'm moving on with my life.
491
00:23:21,800 --> 00:23:23,640
That's essentially what her attitude is.
492
00:23:23,640 --> 00:23:25,600
Now she's focused on future battles
493
00:23:25,600 --> 00:23:28,920
that she's gonna have to prepare for, right?
494
00:23:28,920 --> 00:23:31,240
But she's not living in the past anymore,
495
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:32,960
she's not even living in the future.
496
00:23:32,960 --> 00:23:36,200
She's taking the steps right now here in the present
497
00:23:36,200 --> 00:23:39,840
in order to prepare for the future battles, right?
498
00:23:39,840 --> 00:23:44,840
And hey, what I wanna take from that is that,
499
00:23:45,480 --> 00:23:47,040
the change that you want to achieve
500
00:23:47,040 --> 00:23:49,240
is honestly closer than you think.
501
00:23:49,240 --> 00:23:53,920
All it may take is for you to face and accept your past,
502
00:23:53,920 --> 00:23:57,800
because you can't change it, but you can learn from it.
503
00:23:57,800 --> 00:23:59,080
And honestly, you can let it change you.
504
00:23:59,080 --> 00:24:02,560
You can let it change you into somebody who's better,
505
00:24:02,560 --> 00:24:04,040
who's better off, right?
506
00:24:04,040 --> 00:24:05,760
Who's stronger than you were before,
507
00:24:05,760 --> 00:24:09,840
who, and not just stronger physically, but mentally too.
508
00:24:09,840 --> 00:24:12,560
Because again, these are all internal battles
509
00:24:12,560 --> 00:24:15,480
that no amount of lifting is gonna help you overpower,
510
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:16,720
right?
511
00:24:16,720 --> 00:24:18,760
Unless you're like Goku who can fight as a spirit,
512
00:24:18,760 --> 00:24:21,360
but you know, I'm not Goku, so.
513
00:24:21,360 --> 00:24:25,200
But no, seriously, in all seriousness,
514
00:24:26,240 --> 00:24:31,240
facing your past is just one step, right?
515
00:24:32,080 --> 00:24:33,440
Actually, even before you face it,
516
00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:35,320
the first step is acknowledging it, right?
517
00:24:35,320 --> 00:24:39,600
You have to acknowledge that, hey, I messed up,
518
00:24:39,600 --> 00:24:41,080
or hey, this happened to me.
519
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,560
Is it tragic and unspeakable?
520
00:24:45,560 --> 00:24:46,760
It may be.
521
00:24:46,760 --> 00:24:48,800
It honestly may be, I don't know.
522
00:24:48,800 --> 00:24:51,720
But if it is that for you, you know,
523
00:24:53,800 --> 00:24:56,000
again, my heart goes out to you.
524
00:24:56,000 --> 00:24:58,040
Seriously, guys, I can't say I understand.
525
00:24:58,040 --> 00:24:59,440
I know it because I don't.
526
00:24:59,440 --> 00:25:01,640
I'm not gonna insult what you've gone through
527
00:25:01,640 --> 00:25:03,240
by saying that I do.
528
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:07,800
But what I do know is that you're not alone in all of this.
529
00:25:07,800 --> 00:25:09,840
You're not alone in your suffering,
530
00:25:09,840 --> 00:25:13,400
in that dark place that you're in.
531
00:25:13,400 --> 00:25:18,480
And again, I just encourage you all to,
532
00:25:18,480 --> 00:25:21,640
for all of us to find the people that we can share this with,
533
00:25:21,640 --> 00:25:24,560
you know, share the good times and the pain, right?
534
00:25:24,560 --> 00:25:27,600
Because again, you don't want anybody
535
00:25:27,600 --> 00:25:30,440
who's only around when you're up, right?
536
00:25:30,440 --> 00:25:32,960
You want someone who will get down in trenches with you.
537
00:25:32,960 --> 00:25:36,560
And you want to be like that for somebody else, right?
538
00:25:36,560 --> 00:25:40,320
Those are how true bonds and friendships
539
00:25:40,320 --> 00:25:43,280
and brother and sisterhoods are formed, right?
540
00:25:43,280 --> 00:25:48,280
And so, but again, all of this starts with you.
541
00:25:48,280 --> 00:25:49,840
You have to be willing to take,
542
00:25:49,840 --> 00:25:51,680
at least take the first step, right?
543
00:25:51,680 --> 00:25:53,160
You don't have to go through the whole road alone,
544
00:25:53,160 --> 00:25:56,520
but you have to make the decision to go first,
545
00:25:56,520 --> 00:25:59,800
take that first step and acknowledge,
546
00:26:02,040 --> 00:26:06,320
acknowledge that skeleton in the closet, right?
547
00:26:06,320 --> 00:26:07,160
You have to acknowledge it.
548
00:26:07,160 --> 00:26:10,000
You have to say that this happened.
549
00:26:10,920 --> 00:26:15,600
And then the next step is to face it, right?
550
00:26:15,600 --> 00:26:16,960
I'm not saying to make light of it.
551
00:26:16,960 --> 00:26:20,080
I'm not saying to just say to laugh it off
552
00:26:20,080 --> 00:26:20,920
or anything like that.
553
00:26:20,920 --> 00:26:23,080
I'm saying to really look at it, to really face it
554
00:26:23,080 --> 00:26:25,040
and then say, you know what?
555
00:26:25,040 --> 00:26:28,840
This happened and it made me feel like this.
556
00:26:28,840 --> 00:26:31,800
And I wouldn't wish this on anybody else.
557
00:26:31,800 --> 00:26:36,200
Or I wish that I was smarter, I was better back then.
558
00:26:36,200 --> 00:26:40,080
But I know now, I know that I'm better off now.
559
00:26:40,080 --> 00:26:44,800
I know that I'm, you know, 10 billion percent smarter
560
00:26:44,800 --> 00:26:48,480
and better now and I won't make those same mistakes again.
561
00:26:48,480 --> 00:26:51,040
Or I won't let this situation happen again.
562
00:26:51,040 --> 00:26:53,800
And so once you acknowledge it, you face it,
563
00:26:53,800 --> 00:26:55,680
then you have to accept it, right?
564
00:26:55,680 --> 00:26:57,440
And I honestly think out of the three,
565
00:26:57,440 --> 00:26:59,000
that might be the hardest part,
566
00:26:59,000 --> 00:27:03,480
is accepting the fact that, okay, this is a part of me now.
567
00:27:03,480 --> 00:27:05,760
You know, we can't change it.
568
00:27:05,760 --> 00:27:07,800
It's part of our life, it's part of our story.
569
00:27:07,800 --> 00:27:11,080
And it may not be something you want to go back
570
00:27:11,080 --> 00:27:13,920
and revisit, but you can't erase it.
571
00:27:13,920 --> 00:27:18,920
So, but once you learn to accept it in any capacity, right?
572
00:27:19,920 --> 00:27:21,240
That had to be all at once.
573
00:27:21,240 --> 00:27:22,560
Because again, all of this is a journey,
574
00:27:22,560 --> 00:27:23,400
all of this is a journey.
575
00:27:23,400 --> 00:27:26,040
I'm not telling you to completely change your mindset,
576
00:27:26,040 --> 00:27:27,680
completely change how you're thinking about things,
577
00:27:27,680 --> 00:27:30,280
but just to be open, right?
578
00:27:30,280 --> 00:27:33,840
To accepting it, even just a little bit a day, right?
579
00:27:33,840 --> 00:27:37,200
You'll find that a giant weight
580
00:27:37,200 --> 00:27:38,560
has been lifted off your shoulders
581
00:27:38,560 --> 00:27:39,800
and you can breathe freely.
582
00:27:39,800 --> 00:27:43,320
You can breathe, you know, fully again.
583
00:27:43,320 --> 00:27:47,320
And now, honestly, now the fun part starts, right?
584
00:27:47,320 --> 00:27:50,520
Now they're rebuilding and building yourself up
585
00:27:50,520 --> 00:27:54,800
and being able to move, learn how to move throughout life
586
00:27:54,800 --> 00:27:57,520
without that chain, without that weight,
587
00:27:57,520 --> 00:28:01,120
and really live, right?
588
00:28:01,120 --> 00:28:03,600
You get to live life instead of surviving it.
589
00:28:03,600 --> 00:28:08,600
And once you make that mindset shift, then everything,
590
00:28:09,360 --> 00:28:11,520
everything in the sun is yours.
591
00:28:11,520 --> 00:28:14,200
So again, I just want you guys to really take that to heart
592
00:28:14,200 --> 00:28:18,000
and really, and just really work on it, you know?
593
00:28:18,000 --> 00:28:21,120
You just realize that, hey, this may be your journey,
594
00:28:21,120 --> 00:28:23,040
but you're not alone.
595
00:28:23,040 --> 00:28:23,880
What?
596
00:28:23,880 --> 00:28:25,480
Anyway, that's all I got for you guys today.
597
00:28:25,480 --> 00:28:28,000
So I want to thank you for tuning in to today's episode.
598
00:28:28,000 --> 00:28:30,040
And I pray that you got what you needed out of it
599
00:28:30,040 --> 00:28:32,960
and that hopefully you learned something new about yourself.
600
00:28:32,960 --> 00:28:35,320
And hey, feel free to subscribe to the podcast
601
00:28:35,320 --> 00:28:36,160
and leave a review.
602
00:28:36,160 --> 00:28:38,440
I would love reading you guys' reviews and comments.
603
00:28:38,440 --> 00:28:40,880
It helps me improve each and every episode.
604
00:28:40,880 --> 00:28:43,120
And always remember, you are the main character
605
00:28:43,120 --> 00:28:47,040
of your story, and that story doesn't end until he says so.
606
00:28:47,040 --> 00:28:48,160
All right, be blessed.
607
00:28:48,160 --> 00:29:11,160
And I'll see you guys next time.
