Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to another episode of Couple of Nukes. As always, I'm your host, Mr. Whiskey, and this recording is being done around just, I just got back from my cruise for podcasters. It's been a hectic few days, and uh, I am now sick. I feel like that was inevitable between the, a lot of sunlight, uh, not a lot of sleeping, and then, you know, trying to stay up every night, catch up on work online afterward.Uh, I have reached the inevitable point of Stuffy nose and sore throat. So it was worth it. It was worth it Uh, I just apologize ahead of time. Luckily. Our guest is not sick and he sounds great. So we're gonna have a good time Uh by just having him take over the mic here But with that being said i'm excited to host him because while we've talked about addiction and recovery a lot on the show I really like our guest's approach which you know having read through his bio.It's You Sometimes you can do all the right things you can do all the healing and you can feel great But there's something just almost eating away at you on the inside some kind of feeling of negativity that you just can't Classify and our guest it took him quite a while after healing to discover what that was so hopefully we're going to save y'all some time here by helping you out and maybe if you're Just starting the journey of healing going to start it or have been healed for a while, but feel something wrong This episode hopefully will speak to you.So we are here with mr. Patrick Casey Would you please go ahead and introduce yourself for us? Yeah, thanks, Mr. Whiskey. Hey, guys, I'm Patrick Casey. And as, as Mr. Whiskey said, I have been in recovery from drugs and alcohol for 22 years. This past August, we celebrated 22 years, which is killer. Nice. I got sober at 19 years old.So it's been a long, long journey. Um, you know, I was fortunate enough to hit my bottom at 19 years old and we can go into that at some point if you want to, but yeah, I was fortunate. I was like, hit my bottom at 19. So, you know, I got to kind of grow up in recovery chronologically and, you know, emotionally and spiritually and everything too, right?So like. You know, it's been, it's been a really cool, really cool path, really cool journey to be able to, you know, learn how to be a man, learn how to be adult all the while, you know, getting over drugs and alcohol and like you said, um, still kind of hitting more bottoms along the way because life continues to happen and, you know, And it's just another growth stage, another growth stage that we continue to come, come into contact with.So, and then we either, you know, overcome it or we let it get the best of us. And so, you know, my choice has always been to persevere, um, no matter how uncomfortable I get. And just to continue to move on forward. Cause you know, I, I don't want to slip backwards. I don't want to go back to the life I had before.Of course. And it's, uh, it's almost comical in a sense that you're a rock bottom, Is where some people are just starting at 19, you know, some people are just starting And like I said, I didn't even have a legal drink of alcohol, you know what I mean? Yeah, yeah for sure so Let's, let's just jump right into that, you know, 19 years old, hitting rock bottom there.So I mean, let's talk a little bit about your upbringing and what kind of, what factors played into at such a young age, getting involved with drugs and alcohol. Yeah. So, you know, I'm, I'm always kind of mindful, I always say about kind of towing the line. I don't, I don't want to throw my family under the bus.I don't want to paint a bad negative picture, right? I mean, hey, they might listen to this one day. Um, but you know, for me, my perspective, cause that's what it's all about. I have two younger sisters. I'm the oldest of three. They might have a completely different perspective, right? A different. Um, um, idea of like what they experienced compared to me, my, my, my interpretation was that there was, you know, there was a lot of kind of up and down turmoil.There was love, there was affection, but there was also abuse, there was also, you know, drinking in the household, there was fighting, there was, you know, um, maybe some neglect, maybe, um, just a lot of confusion, you know, where, where I kind of had to walk around on eggshells, I felt like, because I never kind of knew what was going on.Day after day, like I had to kind of gauge the temperature of the house when I woke up in the morning, right? Like, what kind of mood is everybody in? You know, what, how do I need to act and behave today? Cause the last thing I want to do is set everything off. Or conversely, I would say I don't care. And I would just go into a rage myself, even as a kid and just call it a bunch of chaos.I would make things worse. Yeah. Like I was, uh, you know, I always say I was a bad kid, but looking back now, I wasn't a bad kid. I was just kind of troubled, right? Like I was always in trouble in school. Like I was always sitting at the, at the teacher's desk in front of the class, right? Like I was always like, you know, Mr.Casey, come up here. You need to sit by the desk by me. And, you know, I was having to, you know, write stuff on the chalkboard, like in the Simpson. Yeah, just like that. That was me back in the 80s. Like, I was having to write on the chalkboard. I was having to dust the erasers in school. Um, you know, teachers always knew ahead of time, like, you know, me and my best friend who lived in my neighborhood, they would say, like, you need to keep Patrick and Sean separate.Like, you need to keep them away from each other, right? Like, that was always, like, going into the class. You know, I did stuff like ran off babysitters. I ran out of the house while being, being babysat and like, you know, scared to heck and, and everything out of everybody. Yeah, of course. So, I mean, you know, I, none of that really makes me an addict or an alcoholic per se.What happened was Basically, like 11 years old, I started smoking marijuana for whatever reason. It was just like a natural. I wasn't afraid. I wasn't afraid, you know, I don't know consciously if I was seeking to feel okay. And I, if I thought like, hey, that might be something the cool kids are doing. And maybe that's something that would make me fit in.Or maybe that's something that would. Make me feel right because I never had trouble fitting in. I was, I was always a friend among friends. I played sports, you know, I was always like the class clown. Like I always had plenty of attention. Right. But for whatever reason, I started smoking marijuana and like, you probably have known and heard and everybody like that can be a gateway.And for me, it was led into. It bled over into literally every substance you could mention to me and ask me right now. Most likely, I tried it and did it probably for an extended period of time. And, um, once I got my driver's license at 16 years old, I never went to a full day of school. I was always skipping class.I was always under the influence of something. I was always just needing to. Not feel the way I felt, right? I always needed to be somebody different. I always needed to ride in with, with people. I always had to have some substance to numb things. And so, yeah, I mean, Mr. Whiskey, looking back now, yeah, chances, chances are, I was, you know, numbing my traumas, I was, I was escaping the turmoil that I grew up in.For lack of better words, right? So I was always trying to just feel better, feel different. Like to me, I would say a fun Friday night or Saturday night with my friends was walking around the shopping plazas that like 10 or 12 years old, smoking little cigarette butts, looking around for the little cigarette butts and ashtrays are on the floor.And smoking cigarette butts, getting a little nicotine buzz, like that's, that's ridiculous looking back now, that's so young. Of course, the older we get, we look back like, yeah, 19 seems really young, 16 even seems younger, but when you're in the middle of it, it doesn't feel, you don't feel right. You're like, you're invincible.So what happened was at 19 years old, um, you know, I tell a story all the time. My, my parents were off at a bowling league. They were, um, you know, entrusted me to watch my two younger sisters at home on a Friday night. They came home from bowling, and they found me, their son, you know, slumped over on the couch with heroin, needle, spoon, belt tied around my arm.And so I was awoken to, like, my dad just violently shaking me, my mom hollering and screaming in the background, and it was just a complete mess, right? So I was out of excuses. It wasn't like the other times they caught me smoking weed or they caught me like, you know, there's a different alcohol. Yeah, it wasn't like, oh, I was just trying it or Hey, so and so introduced me to us.I just wanted to try it. Like, I was already off the deep end by then. And the thing is that I've been wanting for about 6 months to ask for help. And I just didn't know how to ask for help. I wanted to get help. I knew what I was doing was only going to end a couple bad ways. It wasn't going to end good.I wasn't going to just grow out of it and and so it took what it took and so, you know, I believe my higher power intervened because it was a completely unusual circumstance the way it all went down that Friday night for me to even ask for help. put myself in that position to pass out on the couch and, you know, be in the position that I was in because I was, I was never reckless.I was always very careful, meticulous. I was always, you know, I kept it well for my family. Right. And so this was just like a very unusual night that I think I manifested manifested it to happen because I've been wanting help for six months. I just thought maybe Should I tell my parents I'm addicted to pain pills because that doesn't sound as bad as shooting heroin.Like, how do I do this? I just never got the courage to do that. And so that's kind of how it all all laid out. And from there, you know, the rest is history as they say, right? Like, I was taken off to rehab treatment and. I did 46 days of rehab, I did six or seven months in a halfway house, and then me and, you know, some other young knuckleheads like myself all kind of moved into a place together, and we just did sobriety recovery stuff, and on and on and on, and so much more has happened since then.I mean, that was, again, 22 years ago. So did you graduate high school on time, or did you have to go back, or how did that work? Yeah. Again, it was kind of like a Dr. Jack or Mr. Hyde situation. Like you would never know how bad off I was. I graduated probably like a 3. 4. Um, I don't know what the statute of limitations are, but yeah, I definitely cheated a lot, cheated to get by, but I was a smart kid.I was, I was a smart kid. You know, I probably earned most of the GPA that I had. So yeah, I graduated and then I did one year of college at Augusta State University. And that's, that entire year, my first year, first and only year of college up to that point was just horrendous, horrible. You know, I was, I was shooting dope on the, on the school campus and I was going into class completely oblivious to anything that was going on as far as tests go.I remember one time walking into a chemistry class and they're like, all right, take out your number two pencil. It's time for an exam. And I'm looking around going. Did you guys know we had an exam because I was just completely shot. I had no idea. I'm like, here I am, like failing classes, which is not what I do.And since then, you know, I went back to school. I got my bachelor's and master's all in sobriety like that. I'm a very good student, but this for this year, I was not. And so it was, it was a tough time. So yeah, to answer your question, that's, that's pretty much what happened. Okay. Yeah. I know plenty of people who aren't high and still don't know that we have an exam.You know, I think there's plenty of those people, but what I'll say is. In a recent episode with Jen Outlaw, she talked about how, honestly, for her, rehab didn't work until the fifth time around because it wasn't something she wanted for herself, necessarily. But you're talking about, uh, one time at rehab, so.What were the feelings going on in you when you went in and and why you were there? I know you talked about wanting to get help and it's kind of paradoxical when you're a kid and want to get help for something like that because it's, uh, Nowadays, it's not as rare, but that's a pretty rare situation, right?So there's some judgment like, oh my goodness, you're a kid and you're doing drugs, but at the same time, it's like you're a kid You got caught up in the wrong stuff. We want to help you. So it's like there's More feelings of help there and then more feelings of judgment. So it's like especially when it comes to your parents, you know So definitely a lot of stigmas around not wanting to get help or being worried about as a kid, you know How is it going to affect the rest of your life?you know if they they put you in somewhere or What you know at that point in your life, you're like man, i'm just a kid How is this going to affect going especially like when you're in high school, you know Is this going to affect my ability to get a job to go to college like what? What is going to be on the record and what's not.So I totally get that. But you talked about wanting to get help and you end up in rehab. So how was that whole experience? It was good because, yeah, like you said, I was one. I was one of the youngest. I was 19. Um, you know, I think you had to be 18 or older to, you know, for the adult section. And I don't know if there's anybody 18 or not while I was there.But yeah, I was one of the youngest. And I always kind of excelled being. around older guys, like even as a kid playing, playing basketball, soccer, sports in the neighborhood and stuff. I always like hung out with the older kids. You know, I had my friends that were my age, but I liked, I kind of gravitated towards older kids.And I don't know if that's because I, you know, maybe I didn't have older siblings or something, but I always, always did well with that. And so I felt immense relief when I walked into answer your first question when I walked into the treatment center It was like that feeling of just like this deep side.Just like I just had this overwhelming feeling that i'm going to be okay I just had this feeling that like I don't have to run anymore. I don't have to Pretend to be somebody. I'm not like, like I'm done. And so that was helpful. Maybe compared to the person you talked about that took five times. Um, I work in substance abuse as a nurse practitioner now, so I treat people like me all the time.You know, I treat a lot of people with mental health, uh, drug and alcohol addiction. I treat a lot of veterans like yourself. I treat, I treat a lot of first responders, people from all walks of life. And yeah, I mean, dude, some of them are like 20 times in treatment, 30 times in treatment, et cetera. Right.And they've been trying forever. It's not because I'm some special unique person. It's just for whatever reason I was ready. And, you know, I think my higher power put me in the position and put all the right people in my life at the right time. That gave me the chance to either grasp onto it or to let it go and, and, and, and to not take advantage of it.So I took advantage of it. And, um, you know, it was easy because. I was very immature, obviously, as a 19 year old. And, you know, they say when you start doing drugs or alcohol at a young age, your brain kind of slows down and stops developing. Right. So I was lucky enough to be around a lot of older guys who were very encouraging and supportive.And, you know, of course, I always heard the, I wish I would've got it at your age. I wish I would've got it. Yeah. Yeah. And I always get a little defensive to be like, Whoa, you think I'm not that bad? Like, you know, so I get a little defensive, but I knew, and now looking back, I get it. Cause like, you know, now being 41 years old, 19 is young as hell.But when I'm 19, 19 doesn't feel young. You're supposed to live. It doesn't feel like it's a young age. So, um, so yeah, it was a really good experience. I made a lot of really good friends and I started to experience, you know, what it was like to really like have come like real true camaraderie where people could open up and people could cry in these group therapy sessions and, you know, stuff I didn't, I wasn't aware of, like, you know, we're men, we're not supposed to cry, we're not supposed to have feelings, especially in front of other people, you know, um, so I kind of got to experience that and that helped me feel more comfortable.During the times I was there and didn't, um, you know, didn't really know what to do with my feelings. Like for instance, I was there, I think like five or six days in and I was kind of starting to feel feelings and I was starting to remember some childhood things, if you will. And I started to really feel poorly about myself.And my first instinct was like, I need to leave. I need to go jump over that wall. I need to go get high. Like, I can't deal with this. The hell with this. Screw this. And somebody pulled me aside and said, what's up? I said, man, I'm starting to like really remember some of these things and I don't like this.I don't really want to talk about this. And they're like, dude, you got to like, if like, this is what, this is what makes or breaks you. This is where you're right. Really starts. So I went in front of the group and I just vomited all my stuff, man. And I had that first experience with like what it's like to open up and bear my soul to other people and really feel like.Wow, I didn't get shamed. Nobody laughed at me. Nobody bullied me afterward. And so I had that first feeling of like, being vulnerable, but also being safe and secure at the same time. And so like, that's helped me in my sobriety and other stuff we'll talk about later where I was able to open up in front of people and, and kind of see like, hey, this is who I am.For whatever reason, I still have these struggles. And this is how I'm going to get better. But if I just. Ignore it and keep stuffing it down or distract myself with with dating different women or getting different jobs or spending money or focusing on all these other things. I'm doing the same thing I did.I'm just not using drugs or alcohol to ignore my feelings and my traumas. So I'm, you know, my, my, my coach, she says, you have to feel it to heal it. So if I'm not feeling it, it's not going to get better. It's just going to, I'm just going to delay the inevitable. Yeah. And I know a lot of people, whether they were former addicts or recovery specialists who have been on the show, talk about an AA, they talk about this 12 step program.Is that also involved with rehab or they have some form of that, that y'all follow through? So some rehabs are what they call 12 step focus where they do for lack of better words push that on on the on the clients that are there they take them to 12 step meetings or they have people come in that whole 12 step meetings other places use alternative programs because some people will say I did that a crap or I did that 12 step crap it doesn't work I want to do something else and so yeah for sure cater to those people so you don't like actually do the steps in those places you But they do talk about it.They kind of get you started with that. And for people like me who were ignorant, didn't know what AA was, 12 steps or anything like that. It was like, oh, okay, that's what it is. And then it's like, okay, go get a sponsor. And then when you leave here, you know, that's where the rubber meets the road, right?Like, that's where the work begins. And then hopefully you'll continue. Um, you know, I always say like, you know, 12 step meetings and programs don't have a monopoly, but there's a reason why it's been around for like 85 plus years and it's translated over 200 languages and it's in, you know, 200 plus countries and stuff like that for a reason.So it's obviously working for millions and millions of people, but it doesn't mean it's the only way. So I try to like impress that, especially upon my patients and clients that I work with, you know, cause I treat them. You know, as the practitioner, I'm really usually met it, you know, treating them with medications and going over lab work with them.Like, I don't really talk a lot about sobriety. I kind of keep my recovery anonymous because I don't want to blur the 2 things unless there's like, kind of a life or death situation where I think it might really make a real helpful impact. And so sometimes I run into them outside of work. At places and they're like, Oh, you're in recovery.I'm like, yeah, like, Oh, I thought something was different about you. You're not like the other doctors or practitioners I'm used to talking to. So, so that's always a lot of good feedback that I get. So I really enjoy the work because I get to. I get to treat people that are in all different phases of their recovery.So it's, it's really, really rewarding to be able to do that. And, you know, I get to, I get to make a living doing what I love. Like how many people get to say that, you know, I don't, I don't hate my job. I don't dread going to work every day. You know, I've, I've been there before, before I went back to school and got an education.I don't, I don't, I don't want to experience that. Yeah. So we talked about the beginning and now we're at present day, but let's talk about that long in between you You know sobered up you were going to school again. You started working at some point But as we alluded to in the very beginning of the episode We talked about something not feeling right Can we kind of elaborate upon those feelings and what exactly that looked like in your life?Uh, because it could be different for everyone but in general this just unsettling feeling that something's wrong and Maybe it's manifesting in the world through actions or behaviors or maybe just thoughts, but can we get into that? Yeah, so even though like you said I had been sober for a long time.I'd been helping tons and tons of people I've gotten help from other people i've done like my own journeys with therapy Um, you know, there was a point when I was, I think, like nine months sober, I took antidepressants for a year and a half. I went down that route and, you know, I didn't really need them for a long period of time.I did therapy for a couple years, like I said, and something was just going on even about 18 months ago where I was even aware of it. I just kind of thought, you know, maybe I'm not practicing my recovery stuff well enough because like, I'm still blowing up in traffic. I'm still having like rage episodes.Um, you know, I was married before I was married for four years. I was with the same, same woman for 10 years. And for those years we were married and, and there's a lot of things that won't get into it that we don't need to, but if we want, but basically the marriage just didn't work out. But a lot of it was.Was my, you know, I was having attitudes. I was kind of playing out. I was kind of playing out like the marriage I grew up experiencing with my, my, my family. Right. So like I was doing the same, the silent scorn, having the rage episodes, and there was just a lot involved to where I wasn't being the person I thought I should be as a sober man and a man who's like got a really good life built up.And so that, that marriage ended. I got into a new relationship a little while later and we're still together for seven years now. And it's, it's wonderful. So what happened was my girlfriend was following this lady who does podcasts just like yourself, but she's been doing it for like 10 years. She has a really big following and she was holding a life event in Southern California where she does a lot of really cool healing modalities and really cool processes.And I've been hearing my girlfriend talk about this lady she was following and stuff. She's like, I'm going out to this event. Uh, really, you know, would you come with me? I'm not really comfortable going out there. Like, oh, I've only talked to these people on zoom and stuff. Like, would you come with me? And I've been, you know, sober a while and I'm like, open minded, like, okay, cool.Maybe I'll get a little bit of self help or something out of it. Like, okay, let's go. And I went there. And again, I wasn't really aware of that. I probably really looking back. I probably never really slowed down long enough to acknowledge the fact that, That I really wasn't still feeling complete for some reason that I still wasn't really acknowledging the fact that like, I don't know how to take compliments from people.I still don't love myself to the extent that I feel like I ought to. I, um, I still talk really negative to myself. I'm like, I'm like that really critical parent to myself. Like I'm still doing all that. When I make a mistake, I'm like, you stupid idiot. And, you know, I'm just like really hard on myself, right?Like really have, um, a lot of expectations on myself. And when I fall short. I just beat the hell out of myself. I didn't really realize and think it was affecting me, because how could it? I have this great profession. I live down here in Jupiter, Florida near the beach. You know, I have a, you know, I have a motorcycle.I'm in this, I'm in this boxing thing that I do. I play soccer. I have all these really cool hobbies and go out on the boat all the time and fish and have a beautiful girl and a good income. Like, Nothing could be wrong with me, right? When you look at it from the outside, but you can't see my insides. You can't see that there's still like this rawness and woundedness that I really wasn't even paying attention to.That's a long way around about saying I was at this event and we were at the end of the event. It was a three to two and a half day event and we were passing a microphone around and it was about 40 people. We're basically like taking a turn for about five or 10 minutes talking about what we experienced, what we got out of the event, any breakthroughs.And I was holding the microphone. I was looking over at my girlfriend and I just started crying in front of this room of like 40 people. I don't know any of them except my girlfriend, Caitlin. Right, right. Crying in front of them. And I'm just like, I want to love myself like she loves me. Like, I want to look at myself the way that she looks at me.Wow. Yeah. How, why, why am I not there? Like, you don't understand all of the accomplishments and accolades and everything I've done, but those are just superficial, right? Like, Why is it? Why am I not there? And so the coach came up to me, the lady that was holding the event. Her name is JJ. She came up to me and she said, I can help you like, like, this weekend shouldn't end on a note like that.Like, like, this needs to be better for you. I can help you. And I was just like, for whatever reason, I was just like. Sign me up. I don't know what that looks like. I don't know what that means. I live in Florida. You live in California, but all right, let's do it. And, uh, that turned into this six month long program I did, which was obviously over zoom, but we also had some live events where you got, we got together a couple of times during that six months.And I just had just breakthrough after breakthrough, after breakthrough, after breakthrough. And man, it's just like completely transformed my life again. Like it was like another Growth again, another advancement in my life and my spirituality. And so what's happened is like, I've taken on coaching now.Like I want to be able to coach, especially other men like us who might suffer that I don't want to be like, like pinned down to just helping people with addictions. Like I want to be able to also help like the everyday man who struggles with the same stuff with anger, rage. You know, dissatisfaction in their relationships, wondering why things aren't working out, mental health, like, maybe nothing at all to do with drugs and alcohol.And the cool thing is, like, we can do it like this, like, we can talk over zoom, we come up with a program, we come up with steps and modalities, right? So I can pass on the stuff that I use. That was super helpful. And then even more that I'm starting to implement and share that with with some other guy.Like, that's amazing to me. I can do it all over the world. You know, uh, as a nurse practitioner, I can only help you if you work in Florida. And again, I don't want to really help people medically anymore. I want to help people from the inside, really get down to the core cause of everything. Cause that's, That's what was transforming to me was figure out my core wounds, which are feeling defective, feeling devalued and feeling disapproved of.So whenever I'm getting triggered and one of those things are happening, I have this reaction, right? I either get like super pissed and rageful, defensive, I retreat, I isolate, I withdraw, whatever the case is, depend on the situation. And so like. having that knowledge was helpful, but that wasn't enough. I had to take it to the next level, which was like, now I got to do some hard things to change that thought process, right?Like we can't think our way into like acting differently. We have to act our way into thinking differently. So the more I take these actions and do things that might seem like really silly or stupid or don't make any sense, like what does this have to do with becoming a better person or changing my negative thought patterns?It ends up happening over time. It's like, wow, I do these things. And I look back and I go, oh, okay, it didn't kill me. That didn't hurt. It was scary, but life is about doing scary, hard things, right? Like, I could show you have millions of examples with your experience, you know, being in the military and doing this podcast and everything you've been through, like, like, you do hard things that your brain might say.A thousand reasons why you shouldn't do it. And you say, no, we're doing it. Anyways, we're going to fricking do it. And then you do, and you come onto your side and you go, that was awesome. I'm going to do this other thing. And then you build a track record where you start to have a belief now, and now your habits start to change.Right. So, man, I wouldn't be able to share that with other people because there's tons of tons of dudes like us that, that are struggling and there's women who are struggling with their man and they want to get their man help and they don't really know how to communicate that to their man. So. You know, I've been coming up with some online courses I'm doing.I have a free master class that I did that anybody can access if they go to it. It's, uh, it's breaking through destructive patterns. And right now I have another one that's about to come out towards the end of this month, actually about it's for women really, or people who are, you know, have a man in their life.It's called five, five effective ways to communicate with the man struggling in your life. It's, it's going to be helpful for people to communicate. So whether you have a son, a friend, a cousin, a husband, boyfriend, whatever the case is, you know, so that you can communicate with the man without feeling like you're nagging him and pressuring him and being a pester to him, you know, to, to help him maybe find like the courage to go be vulnerable and to get some help.And sometimes it's just leading by example. Yeah, and you said something so important, which this isn't for addicts only. And what I'll say is, what you talked about, the negative thoughts, the self hate, the not feeling accomplished, all the criticism, all of that is something that we all feel. But when you're an addict, you know, formerly, and you're recovering, you try to associate everything negative in your life To the addiction almost in a blame way and so like you said you're saying to yourself But I'm not doing the drugs anymore.Why am I still this I'm not drinking anymore Why am I still this and then we realize that some of her flaws or because of aren't because of the addiction They're just who we are And maybe not addiction. Maybe you were blaming it on the trauma you saying well, you know It's this particular relationship and once I get in a New relationship, uh, things will change the way I talk or the way I react or you know, maybe it was Even the military environment for example you're saying it's just because i'm stressed because of of work or this and that and then we find out that it's something that We're all going with and maybe it's something we need to work on independent of or you know Those main negative things in our lives that affect our behavior.And so I think it's so important for anyone who's listening, right? It's not just about being in recovery or being a former addict. It's about You know, emotional suppression in general, and I think, you know, Mr. Casey talked about. You could have if you hadn't gone to that podcasting event, you know, you could have just continued to suppress it push it down be like You know, it's just a stupid thought or it's just a phase or you know If I sometimes it can affect you where you're like, I need to accomplish more and more and more Then you're just pushing yourself to your limit burning out trying to achieve stuff and still feeling empty So I really appreciate you, you know coming on the show and going on other shows and creating these programs to help people I think it's boring.Like you said when it comes to a man and a woman, if we're not recognizing or understanding this, this voice inside of ourselves, it's going to be even harder to communicate to someone else what it is. And so many people will just brush it off and be like, Oh, you know, it's just a bad thought.It's just passing. Just as, as we try to do. It's so important to have someone who says, you know what, no, that's, that's a really bad thing and you need to address it by doing X, Y, or Z. And so I know you have a, Website Mr. Casey and I want to plug it here for everyone. I mean you talked about your programs and and all that I mean, what can we really find on your website?That would be helpful to everyone. Yeah, so it's right now It's it's it's a landing page. So if you go to Patrick Casey jr. com, that's Patrick Casey jr. com It'll take you to, um, you know, put in your, your email and your name, and it'll take you to my masterclass. And in that it's 60 minutes long, it's a video I shot with PowerPoints and it'll explain a little bit more about my background, a little bit more about what I've been through and a little bit more about, again, the steps you can take to get through some of your self destructive patterns.And in that towards the end, I have the information. If you want to do some coaching or I offer some resources in there, like some really good podcasts. That I recommend some really good books that I recommend, you know, some techniques that you can use everything that's free, basically, that you can use on your own to kind of get started.And then, you know, I can also do a free 15, 20 minute consultation call to see if, like, what's going on with you. Do you want to, you know, do I resonate with you at all? Oh, and my. Am I somebody you're like, I don't want to talk to you ever again, or like, you know, dude, you're awesome. Like this really fits. I want to work with you.Like we can go over that kind of stuff too. And then again, eventually probably towards the end of this month on that landing page too, I'll be able to direct people to the other class that I have coming up. I'm on Instagram as well at Patrick Casey Jr. You can find me on Instagram too. And, and on there, you know, see a lot of cool videos and pictures.And, you know, like we were talking beforehand, you know, I've done some boxing matches and, you know, one Florida golden gloves for masters, which is, which is like over 40 years old, which sounds cooler than it is, but basically, you know, you beat up other guys that are over 40 years old that are in your weight class.And that's, that's something I've done because of this journey, you know, I got in the box and at 37 years old, I'm 41. That was one of those. Big scary things that I was like, well, I'm going to try it out and do it. And I really like it. Enjoy it. And I'm, I'm fairly okay. I'm fairly okay at it. You know? So there's been a lot of cool things and on the Instagram you'll see, you know, some other stuff I used to do as a nurse practitioner with some of the charity events and, and, you know, cancer walks and stuff that we did back in the day.So there's like a lot of cool stuff on the Instagram you can find and, and some reels from some podcasts I've been on, such as like here talking with you. So there's a lot of resources on my Instagram and. You know, it's, it's cool if somebody wants to talk and, or if they have somebody else, they think like might.Benefit from getting help like right for sure about that anyway, because a lot of us always want to help somebody else We always know somebody that has Problems that we think would benefit and if only they would you know, make a change, you know They could we we can see it in other people that They're struggling, but we can also see like how better their life can be if they were to make some changes. Yeah. So ladies and gentlemen, why that in the description below? And yes, Mr. Casey, when he was talking about the podcast, he recommend he was talking about a couple of nukes is that's the show he was, that was the show he was referring to. Uh, but yeah, Mr. Casey, before we sign off here, Just, I mean, what, what's the last bit of advice you would leave us with for those who are currently having that negative voice in their head, you know, whether it's, it's criticism, whether it's just this feeling of unaccomplishment, whatever it may be.I mean, what would be your advice to them? Because not all of us are going to end up at a podcast live session crying in front of 40 people, right? But, You know, it will manifest some way or another but what's a way we can be proactive And kind of jump ahead of that kind of moment and take care of it. So for me it is doing appreciations It's it's writing down or talking to somebody and literally going through like everything I appreciate like filling up an entire notebook page down to the simplest stuff Like I have my driver.I appreciate having my driver's license. I appreciate having all four of my extremities. I appreciate my health I appreciate Where I live, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera. And then also the other thing is to help get me out of that negative mindset is, are you writing like anywhere from like three, four or five things in the corner of my page of like things I'm looking forward to, right?So those might be things that are actually about to come up in my life, or those might be things I want to happen, right? Like, I'm looking forward to having the relationship. That's just going to knock my socks off. I look forward to. Finding that job, that career that's going to land me all the money in the world.I need to feel independent and to be, be, you know, able to do the things that I want to do with my life, or it might be, I'm looking forward to going to that concert I have scheduled next weekend with my friends. Like, so it's stuff that. Can help kind of get me out of that naked mindset because if you're like me man It's everything is just like you look at things from the pessimistic The glass is half empty side of stuff, you know So the little bit that I do and sometimes I do stuff little things too.Mr. Whisky. I'll leave it at this is like If I'm not really, if I'm kind of stressed and not feeling good, I might just think about my girlfriend's dog, thinking about my girlfriend's dog leaning man. It's just make, makes me smile. When I think about, I might think about my girlfriend, Caitlyn, our relationship, and that just kind of makes me smile.So I just, I find things that kind of make me smile on the inside and sometimes I just smile and, and just smile. And even a fake smile makes me start to kind of feel a little bit better. 'cause man, for so many years it's just everything was so negative and doom and gloom, man, like. Yeah, and you can't do it overnight.You can't go from like super duper, duper depressed to like happy, joyous, and free all at once. You have to go in stages. Right? Little bit. Little bit at a time. And so if you have the patience Yeah. Start doing some of those things today. Yeah. Why wait? I'm actually reaching down, putting my dog right now.She keeps trying to jump up in my lap. That's why I look like this. Look like I was leaning in. Mike. She's. Come here, I'll, I'll, I'll get it. Yeah, let's see her. Yeah, she's my little chihuahua baby. Oh, look at her. Her nails are a little long, and I was just sitting here, and I hear the little click, click, click, click.And then she started like pacing circles around my chair. And I was like, here, I'll pet you so you stop walking in circles. Yeah, she's like, time's up. I know, I know, I know. It's been an hour, we gotta go out. She's so small, but um, you put her in an empty apartment with me and like she was drinking her water.It's just like there's a waterfall over there, you know, uh, but yeah, I think, yeah, yeah, I think it's what you said is so important, you know, just smiling. Um, I know middle school and high school, they always say, oh, it takes more muscles to frown than smile. So smile. Um, but yeah, it also just, it's a good thing.And I think, like you said, Just an appreciation, and especially, ladies and gentlemen, if you're in recovery. Just think about where you were. I mean, right? I mean, you think about in Mr. Casey's case. Mr. Casey's case. You know, he was, I mean, slumped out in a chair at 19, and now he's helping people every day.Like he said, doing a thing he loves, and um, just look at where you are, and even if you don't necessarily love your job, how many people could even do your job? How many people are in that position, and like you said, even something as simple as a driver's license or having all four Of your extremities sometimes five of them, you know, how I mean, it's just It's just great, you know to have all that and to have the life you have so I agree with you Appreciation is is always so important, especially in recovery And so smile ladies and gentlemen, and and if you want to smile shameless plug I performed a comedy skit on a cruise and i'll have that in the link description below so you can check that out Hopefully it makes y'all Uh, if you're military, you'll appreciate it more.Uh, but yeah, that was one of those things when you were talking about doing something that just requires a bit of bravery, that's outside your comfort zone going to, I mean, I encourage everyone at least once in your life. Try to do an open mic. It's three minutes, right? I mean most people are supportive.Um, If you do at a bar, most people are drunk, right? So But um, that's one of those things or or boxing after 40 years has to be the scariest thing in the entire world I I think so. I think so. I think i'd be quicker to Yeah, you know it's funny barrett matthews he's a great guy He was my roommate on the cruise.She goes, Look, the difference between you and me, Mr. Whiskey, is I'm singing, right? So, when I'm done, they're either gonna love the song or hate it, but that's at the end. I'm already walking off stage. She goes, You know during it, you know, you're telling a joke and it's just silent in the room. That's bad.They're not gonna say nothing till the song is over and by that time my nerves are we're good. We're cool I said, you know what? That is so accurate It would crush me if I told the joke and it was crickets. I'm like, oh, I need to get off the stage Yeah, the first time I ever performed at an open mic and one of my jokes I guess was just a younger generation joke and I had a room full of advanced in years people really knowledgeable people and they uh It was just silent.I'll tell you, there's never been a more painful moment. You want to talk about being forced to smile. The, uh, the second hand embarrassment I felt of myself, you know. It's like I zoomed out third person and I was like, look at this clown on stage, you know. Yeah, that's tough. Next time we have Mr. Casey on the show, he won't just be Golden Gloves of Florida, he'll be Golden Mike of Florida due to his comedy performances.That's it. Looking forward to I never say never. I've learned never say never. But yeah, Mr. Casey, thank you so much for coming on the show. It's been a great time. And like I said, ladies and gentlemen, you can find him in the description below, both his Instagram and his website. And if you're someone who wants to talk to him in general or about recovery or find out some resources He's a great source for that.So definitely reach out to him. But mr. Casey, thank you again for coming on the show I appreciate it. Yeah. Thanks for having me again. Mr. Whiskey. I appreciate that man. Thanks
